Thursday's brew notes...

I'm always looking to try new styles, even those that I'm not particularly fond of.  I don't like ESBs (Extra Special/Strong Bitters) - you casual micro drinkers know this as Redhook's flagship brew.  I don't like wheat-based beers either, but I did that Grand Cru and that was widely appreciated, so I guess I need to branch out if I'm going to start a brewery (2014 spoiler alert).  So I made a compromise with myself and created an English Bitter.  I named it Brit-Bit, because to be honest, I'm terribly amused with three things:  a) Britney Spears' nickname is or used to be Brit-Brit; b) Britney Spears' toy chihuahua's name was Bit-Bit; and c) I'd love to see what would happen if the two could successfully breed.  Okay, the entirety of that is false, but I thought Brit-Bit (British Bitter) was catchy in that very vein of celebridiocy (that's my word, copyrighted).

The usual suspect Jason showed up (and graciously bought the ingredients for the brew, probably around $28 - that makes five gallons, mind you), and our coworker, fellow bartender, and all-around good guy Marc showed up to watch the proceedings.  We got the mash going (all-grain, baby) and cleaned up and sanitized all the necessary gear and bottles to bottle the "It's So Cold in the D" Belgian Imperial Brown ale that John (another fellow bartender that, sadly, no longer works in our unit) and I brewed as a collaboration between Marshall Brewing and Snoddy-Watty Brewery.  Yes, John's last name is Marshall, and Marshall Brewing is a moniker I bestowed upon his excellent brews.  Jason's last name is Snodderly.  Those precious few of you reading this know me as Watty.  Jason's wife came up with Snoddy-Watty....we were going to go with Watson and Holmes, but this is more fitting.  Anyway, I'm digressing.  The mash takes at least an hour, and after sparging (draining out the 'tea' that we had made from the grains and then rinsing them with hot water to flush out the rest of the viable fluids), it was time for them to go.  Marc had to work at 5:30am - props for staying until 8:30pm when he had to drive back to West Seattle!  Jason had something important he had to do with his wife the next morning (massages and French dining in Snoqualmie - pussy), so I had to do the entirety of the boil, the chilling of the wort (finished product), the filtering, the pitching of the yeast, and all the bottling by myself.  Some partner, eh?  I kid.  I finished up around 11:15pm.

I'm curious as to how this beer is going to turn out.  Not that I think it's going to be bad, everything went right.  I used several ingredients that I've never used or incorporated before, and although I tasted the hydro sample (I will explain shortly), that's not a foolproof example of how the beer is eventually going to taste.  For starters, this will easily be the lowest-ABV (alcohol by volume, or as you understand it, alcohol level) beer we've ever made.  OG - original gravity, or the amount of sugars present in the mixture - was 1.042.  For a quick reference point, water is 1.000.  Anything above that equals potentially fermentable sugars, though you're almost completely unlikely to reach 1.000 once fermentation is complete (that would mean that all sugars were able to be converted by the yeast into alcohol, and that's very unlikely).  After using a software program to figure out roughly where this beer is going to end up, I hit the target of 1.040-1.045 OG, and after fermentation bottoms out, I should be at about 1.012 FG (final gravity).  If these numbers are correct, we use the quick equation of OG minus FG times 131 to get the ABV, and 1.042-1.012x131=3.9% ABV.  Thank God.  Two of our last three brews (the ISCITD Belgian Imperial Brown and last week's AG Oatmeal Espresso Chocolate Porter) are going to be upwards of 10% alcohol.  Seriously, the ISCITD is 9.825%, and that's fact.  I'm all for potent beer, but I want these to be something that my friends aren't afraid to drink, and something I'm not going to get overly fuckered up on.

Okay, to explain the term "hydro sample."  When the wort (finished pre-fermented pre-carbonated product) is completed and cooled down to appropriate yeast-adding (pitching) temperatures (roughly 64-74 degrees F), a sample is taken and gauged by a hydrometer.  This hydrometer, as I alluded to before, measures the amount of sugars in the solution.  1.000 = water, and anything above that is potentially fermentable product.  Again, it's rare that you're going to reach 1.000 after fermentation is complete, but it's not unheard of, and some high-alcohol brews have been known to reach sub-1.0 readings.  That just means there's a shit-ton of alcohol in them, as alcohol has a lower density than water.

I'm tired, and it's getting late.  I'll make a post bringing all of you up to speed regarding jargon and whatnot.  Thanks for following.

Chris

New beginnings?

[listening to City and Colour (Dallas Green of Alexisonfire): "Comin' Home" on repeat]

This blog has offered me many idiotic ends.  I've spewed more hatred on here than I care to remember.  Those few of you that read this know what I'm talking about, and might have had the pleasure of reading some of the blog posts I've deleted.  Those same people know that they were deserved, but I'm trying something else this year.  I'm not going to delete my old posts, but I am going to try to drive this blog in a new direction.  I've been brewing beer since October of '11, and I've been receiving excellent reviews on my recipes from my friends.  I can't go further without mentioning Jason Snodderly, the guy I drug into it on my first brew, the guy who has been my mostly-faithful helper for brews (and drinking said brews!).  I won't go into history just yet, but I've been wanting to speak on this evening's brew, and Facebook and Twitter are not an appropriate outlet at this time of night.  I'm not good at Facebooking this time of night, because if I say something sarcastic, I'm asked a million questions.  Here, you know to take me as I am.  I've always been a semi-asshole but I haz gud intenshuns (lol).

Tonight I attempted to make an all-grain version of my (originally partial-mash) Oatmeal Espresso Chocolate Porter.  Partial-mash means (for the layman, quickly) making a sort of tea out of specialty grains and adding a liquid malt extract that is made by another company.  This partial-mash recipe that we have been drinking and giving out has received such good reviews by our friends that we're going to submit a few bottles of that brew into a local homebrew competition.  It is honestly the best porter I've ever had, and probably ranks in the top 5 best beers I've ever drank.

Tonight's brew was a little more than a "bitch and a half."  I expected Jason to join me, but after my visit to the beer supply store (Larry's Brew Supply in Kent, off 212th), he "called out" with a valid reason.  Two coworkers of ours were rumored to join as well, but they also dogged out.  Here I am, driving home with 14 pounds of just-milled grain and a 4 year old in the back seat, and I have to convert this into beer tonight or the grain will lose its freshness.  It's already close to 7:00.

To cut things short, I spent from 8:15 pm to 2:30 am brewing this.  That was never my intention, but with or without helpers it would have taken that long.  The "mash" (making 'tea' out of the grain) took the expected 90 minutes with rinsing the grain (sparging), but that made more liquid than my brew pot could hold.  I added the proper ingredients whilst boiling what "liquor" I could ("liquor" being the 'tea'), but I ended up with more than my pot could hold.  That was a first.  I had a couple boil-overs because I added the remainder when some liquid evaporated.  The boil lasted over 2 hours.  Most boils are 60-90 minutes.  The boil finally started at 11:20...I didn't add the yeast to an appropriately cooled "wort" (finished boiled product) until about 2:45.  Hello, clean-up!  I've heard people say "If you want to brew beer, I hope you enjoy washing dishes" and it's true.

The finished product ended up at an original gravity (OG) of 1.08, which unfortunately means that it will probably end up around 9%, which I do not want this beer to be at.  I will be tweaking this "new" recipe to what I want.  I've only been doing this for less than three months, after all.  I don't want people to be fucked up after one pint!  I will delve further into my exploits (past and present) in further posts.  If you're interested in trying my delicious beer, just hit a brother up.  Thanks as always for reading, and keep posted for more.

Chris

focuspoint faithful....

I have a simple question to ask you. Those of you that have followed the Facebook post to read more of my blog...don't. You don't want to tread here. That being said, I ask this question of you all.

I know that some of you are particularly fond of some of our songs...some of those in particular being 'Learning Curve' or 'Project O.' I have a two part question for you...what songs of ours struck a particular chord in you (no pun intended), and why?

I'm not asking this question to boost my or Paolo's egos, but rather because I'm finding myself stuck on a particular song lately, and I want to know why you feel linked to your particular song.

I've been on a big Alice in Chains kick lately, and though I've never been in the throes of a heroin addiction like Layne Staley was, I find a particular affinity for his defeatist bent in the songs that he wrote. The one that I've found myself really identifying with is "Nutshell" (and the Unplugged version of "Down in a Hole"). YouTube has the Alice in Chains Unplugged version of the song (I have the DVD of the whole Unplugged set), and this is the version that really sucked me into the song. I'm not feeling that I'd be "better dead," as he illustrates, but sometimes I feel that although I have this support group around me....I'm still on my own. I'm sure some of you feel this - ultimately, this life is ours to lead, live, and forge. Make your choices wisely, or hide the poor ones well. I'm far from being someone you should take advice from....and part of what attracted me to this song originally was a "misheard lyric" of "Myyyyy....gift of selfish rage" instead of "gift of self is raped" (the original lyric). But...there's a lesson to be learned here. We all have an identity. I've spent a lot of my life being many things to many people, least of which was my true self. I had a face I had to throw on when my mother forced me to continue being Mormon, I had a face I threw on when I got onstage (eased usually by a fair dosage of alcohol, I do have some stage fright). I have many faces, unfortunately. That doesn't mean your experiences with me have been fake. You all know me, some of you only professionally, some of you during the adrenaline rush after I got off stage, some of you intimately. I am, after all, the "good person" most of you see me as. I'm reading much to far into this song and since I've had a few, I'm delving into speculative regions. I've always been emotionally attached to music, and I hope that those of you who decided to check this out have evaluated your attachment to music as well. Thanks for listening, and I welcome any and all comments. Again, if you came here to read this post, and this post only, don't delve further into this blog. Thanks to everyone who has ever been a focuspoint fan.

Yours,

Chris

Time for the detritus to shine...

I'm pretty sure that the few people that were following my blog that aren't subscribers are no longer paying attention (read: Danny's friends that were expecting me to talk more shit about Tiffany), so I'll continue. Yeah, it's late. Yeah, I'm slightly intoxicated. Let's move on. My birthday is on Friday. I'm turning 29. (sips on a glass of Kestrel's 2007 Syrah) I'm not so coooo with it. Tristan's turning 4 this September, and we're looking into preschool for him. We would have done so last fall, but li'l boy was a bit too smart for that. No point in investing in schooling when he already knows the course material. I'll take a little bit of responsibility for that (more because of his inherited big head), but most of that has to do with Allie's tireless mommyhood. We were separated from November 2009 until...last fall, when we started to work things out. I was officially asked to move back in on Valentine's Day of 2011, so technically it was for over a year. Counseling has worked wonders for us both. I was seeing a counselor for a few months before we decided to see the same counselor for the sake of our marriage. You'd think that there may be a slight conflict of interest there, but not really - most everything I talked about with him had to do with the relationship I had with Allie. Once we started seeing him as a couple, he really put me on the spot. And you know what...that was a good thing. Anyway, Allie has asked me to not be so forthcoming with information about us, so I won't be. Instead, I'll talk about me. And you know that's a subject I'm more than willing to expound upon. I am an alcoholic. It runs in my family. I've fed into it since I moved from smoking excessive amounts of weed to drinking excessive amounts of alcohol. I think what tapped into my familial tendencies derived from a simple equation: when you're young and you're smoking pot, once you're familiar with the drug, you tend to try to get as high as you can. Once I started drinking, I translated the same feelings to alcohol: try to test your limits, and until you establish them, get as 'party-time!' drunk as you can. Unfortunately, if you leave me to my own devices, it doesn't always, but sometimes will, get past that point. I've had more blackout nights than I wish to admit, and to be honest, I'm not going to remember the entirety of this post. I'm most likely to wake up tomorrow and remember I was at the computer, and then freak out about what I said. It's sad, isn't it? I'm coherent right now, but my first reaction tomorrow is going to be to delete everything I said while I was drinking, because I'm afraid I might have said something offensive. Yet, Chris, you're going to remember that you posted on your blog, and you're going to re-read everything you just said. And, yes, you're going to leave it up. You know why? Because you're being as real as you can be right now. Devolving into self-flagellation is not the direction I intended when starting this post, and I think I've done enough of it during my mental vomitus. My (our) counselor has suggested, because of Allie's response (which I may delve into in a minute), that I quit drinking. Because of this, and the discussions we've had during counseling, I'm quitting drinking shortly after my birthday. I say 'shortly' because I'm sure, much like celebrations of the past, my birthday is going to last a couple days. However, once I'm done, I'm done. I'll go out with you if you want, but realize I'm gonna be pounding Sprite (well, preferably ginger ale), and this doesn't mean I'ma be your DD when you're done obliviating yourself. Goodnight, people. Learn from me. Thanks.

Watty - friend, musician, husband, father...teacher?

Yep, that's right. I applied to Ashford University's online program and am tentatively scheduled to start my BA in Social Sciences on the 19th. The idea of being an English teacher has been kicking around in my head for years, and I finally decided to just do it. I'm excited (and a little nervous). Turns out credits DON'T expire (thankfully the money that was spent on community college courses in my young-and-stupid years will still be worth something), and if I have the amount of credits I think I have, I'll probably be starting as a junior.

I've been trying to work on things with Allie and have been spending more time with her and Tristan. I'm cautiously optimistic - things seem to be going pretty well, and we've talked over some of the issues that led to the separation. I've also been trying to find a suitable counselor to talk to and hopefully sort out the nuts and bolts in my head that have been knocked loose. I've started with references from family and friends, but so far it's been difficult to find one that's available when I am.

Music has been put on an indefinite hold. I dink around on my guitar when I can (Tristan loves it when I do), but as far as the band goes, I'm still not talking to Danny. Practice is obviously more difficult (and slightly pointless) when you don't have a drummer. I've not had time for much of that anyway, seeing as pretty much all my time lately has been spent working or being with my family.

I'm still irritated about those two. It's hard to push past the uber-dramatic episode that they and I had, and I know for a fact that this will never be resolved. I'm not sorry for speaking up, and I know they will never stop speaking out, so I guess that's that. That's all I have to say on that subject.

I'm going to go watch a friend and coworker perform his stand-up comedy bit tonight since apparently Nana has Tristan over at her place :). Sounds like a great Thursday night thing to do.

Thanks for listening.

Meh.

It's really hard to keep my mouth shut about what's been happening lately, but after a few times of 'trying to give a dose of their own medicine,' I'm just done with this. Done with arguing, done with listening to threats, done with swiping back. Just deleting everything and moving on.

Re-fire version 2.0

I've tried a few times lately to get this blog kick-started back into life, and have ended up with posts which after sleeping on I felt were not quite of the caliber I intend on continuing this blog with. However, I have a lot to talk about lately, and most of what has happened since the last post I allowed to stay up calls for a 3-drink minimum.

Since I'm on my ninth for the evening, I think that requirement has been satisfied.

Back in November, Allie and I separated. I'm not going into detail as to why, just suffice it to say that it was my decision, and the dreaded 'd' word is still on schedule. I hold no ill will towards her, we still get along quite nicely, but it's just....done. She's a great mother to Tristan and a good person, but she and I just did not work out.

Back in March, I lost my job at QFC because I accidentally violated a very important company policy for which I was cited, had to go to court, and required to pay a very lenient fine.

(On a completely unrelated note, I'm listening to the Smashing Pumpkins' Siamese Dream album as I type this, and I'm on 'Quiet,' the second track, and it is epic.)

After going 'on the dole' as the Brits like to put it, I was unsuccessful in my attempts to re-enter the grocery industry. Things were not looking good for our hero. One fairly fuck-all day, I decided to enter 'bartender' into the Worksource search engine and saw a posting at the airport. I figured, "Fuck it, my stepmom works there and likes it, let's do the derrty dirty." I applied, and sure enough, I got an e-mail an hour later, and a phone call an hour after that, scheduling an interview. Lo and behold, it was for a position at the Anthony's in the airport, which is not RUN by the company I worked for previously, but happened to have a manager who worked with the GM of the Anthony's I did work for.

Bam. I interview. I know the product. I know the expectations. I know the jorb (no typo, Coach Z). I get the fucking job! I am now working at the busiest restaurant on the West Coast. That is not a typo, nor an exaggeration. Seriously, it's the busiest restaurant ON THE WEST COAST. The Thursday and Friday before Memorial Day weekend (which I was training during), the restaurant did $42k+ EACH DAY. That's what my grocery store did on a busy weekend day, and what the Anthony's I used to work for wished to do in a week.

My dad told me I had to put my last job behind me as soon as possible after reading a couple smarmy, angry Facebook posts about my last employer. Here's my last outburst, then. FUCK that company. I do everything I can to spend as little money at any Kroger, Fred Meyer, or QFC-affiliated company. I had nothing against them until QFC's head of HR decided he wanted to make an example out of me by not hiring me back. Their policy is to fire anyone who violates the policy I did, but they have rehired several people back after firing them. I was a rising star in the company, I made assistant store management within a year of being hired, and was never so much as written up or even verbally admonished for anything I did. I was being groomed for the next position above me when this incident happened.

Not only that, but Fred Meyer contested my eligibility for unemployment benefits AFTER I had stopped claiming them in attempts to make me pay back what I had been paid out just to fuck me over one step more. Thanks for wasting my time, and yours as well, since you lost.

Obviously, I'm bitter. However, because of this, I've been given a few choice opportunities, and I am much happier with my current situation than when I was when I was working for that company. I make more money now than I did as a senior journeyman at said store, and I have to work less hours. Not only that, I get to do the job I have loved most out of all the positions I've worked in my history, and I still get union-provided benefits for myself and my son. I've met some amazing people since I lost my job, and I see everything heading in a more positive direction now.

Time to shift into a different gear...music has been slowly progressing towards a different direction. I've spent a lot of my 'down time' working on songs-in-progress that Paolo and I have had in reserve, hoping for another LP sometime this year. We currently have about 13 tracks in relative stages of completion. Some are reworkings of our old band's songs, one or two are poignant Paolo love-ballads for his now-wife Amanda (they're good, I swear!), I want to cover an AAF song called 'What I Feel is Mine,' and we've got some riffs we've been trying to fucking work out that are finally working out. I'm trying to steer away from the Alright EP's overtly dark minor-key negativity in both my guitar stylings and my lyrical content. Though I was particularly content with the gutpunch that that five-track release sent into the musical solarplexus, it's time, as P-loq has said, 'to write something in a major key.'

Tonight's post has reached its end. I'll catch up more with you guys later. Thanks for listening.